Can you believe how cold the sun is?

"I'm going on a trip."
"You're lucky."
"It's for a funeral."
"Oh, I'm sorry."
"I didn't like him."
"Ah."
"But we used to be best friends."
"Oh . . ."
"I'm going to gloat anyway."
". . ."

Chunks

Announcement has the word "ounce" in it.

Fourth Post

Your Profile

I wrote a profile for you. A few details may be missing.

Name: Yes
Age: Yes
Interests: I regularly eat dead things and drink liquids. During the summer, I do some things. In the winter I do some of the same things but also some different things. I may or may not listen to music. Also, I have hobbies.

How many orange juices are in an apple juice?

Ninth Post

The concept of Santa legitimizes lying and trickery on the part of figures responsible for child care. It also promotes the idea that good behavior is meant to be contingent on material rewards. Children who believe in Santa until five or older have been found to be more likely to end up in mental institutions as janitors (see graph below).

Ninth Post

Behold the sockboot. It is a boot that appears to be both a sock and a shoe.

Tomorrow, Santa. Maybe.

Does the funeral home sell apples?

Forty-eighth Post

I sneezed a sneeze that put me at ease
A sneeze that carried so far on a breeze
It touched some bees sitting on keys
They said to me, "Hi, would you like some peas?"

Seventeenth Post